Friday, May 25, 2012

Sex In A Pan


So I have been thinking, unable to sleep at night thinking, about how text messaging has changed dating.  Not that I did a whole lot of dating before text messaging, not that I do a whole lot now, but still I've thought about it.  I THINK there was a time that a man asked a woman on a date and then they made a plan, set a date, a time and a place for this so-called date.  I want to know why it is that actually making a date has fallen by the wayside.  In this case I'm going to blame text messaging, mostly because I love men too much to blame them.  With the advent of text messaging (cell phones really) we have the ability to contact people anytime, any place.  Why set an actual date with someone you're interested in when you can send them a text asking them to meet you in 1/2 an hour because you happen to be in the area.   Generally speaking, if they're interested they will probably agree to the last minute meeting.  I say we should put an end to the last minute date, let's throwback to a time when you set a date, time and place.  I'm not saying it has to be fancy, it can be coffee or ice cream but I have a life and if you're interested enough to want to see me again you should be interested enough to make a PLAN!  Unfortunately this planning thing doesn't happen, I get busy with my life and miss the all important text message or just don't want to put what I'm doing on hold at that time and I never see the guy again.  Then I end up feeling guilty and beating myself up for not "seizing the moment" and running off at the last minute to meet the guy.  This lack of follow through has left me with a bit of a lack in "other areas" shall we say, hence the need for this recipe.  It's not gluten or dairy free and it will probably make me feel like crap later, but I just don't care (kind of like how it works when you take a random home).

What You Will Need:

Graham Cracker Crumbs
1/2 C. cream cheese
1 C. Cool Whip
2 tsp. powdered sugar
1-2 dark chocolate pudding cups
Strawberries

Make the graham cracker crust according to the directions on the box of crumbs.  I used their recipe and cut it in half to make a suitable single serving.  I used a pan that had 4 mini bread loaf molds in it.  I pressed graham cracker crust mix into the bottom and along the sides of one of the loaf molds.  Bake the crust at 350 degrees for 6-8 minutes.  Mix the cream cheese, cool whip and powdered sugar together and then spread at the bottom of your crust.  Layer the pudding on top, as much or as little as you want.  Chill in the fridge for an hour or so to make it more solid.  When it's chilled long enough, top with strawberries and eat up, try not to moan too loudly while you do so!  I swear this dessert is as good as sex (almost).

Now a note for our male readers-PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE try asking a girl out, making an actual plan and then follow through, otherwise there might not be any sex for you...in a pan or otherwise!

Megan S.

Monday, May 21, 2012

Eat more kale.

Seriously, you should be eating more kale.  Not only is it delicious but it's crazy good for you.  And easy!  When I was doing a little research for this post I found that kale is absolutely laden with all sort of good things for you like fiber, calcium, vitamin A, vitamin C, and vitamin K.  The thing that's super cool is that vitamin K helps your body absorb calcium so really it's a double whammy.  Now, I know you all don't read this for health info.  We all just like fun stories and recipes.  But every now and then I gotta get on my soapbox.  So, eat up and enjoy BOTH of my yummy kale recipes!



Kale/Craisin salad

1/2 bunch kale, sliced
1/4 cup pine nuts, toasted
1/4 cup craisins
1/4 cup parmesan (I skip this as I'm not really a dairy person)


Dressing -
1/4 cup lemon juice
2 cloves garlic
1/3 cup olive oil
salt and pepper to taster

Combine salad ingredients in one bowl.  Mix together dressing and toss with salad.  Let chill for a couple hours and serve!

And here's a fun way you can use the other 1/2 bunch of kale!

KALE CHIPS!  Live 'em, learn 'em, love 'em.  Trust.

1/2 bunch kale
Pam olive oil spray
sea salt

Tear kale into bite size bits.  Spray with olive oil and sprinkle with salt.  Bake at 400 degrees til crunchy and awesome (about 20 mins).

Also, one last little thing that has been bothering me for a while.  Is there hidden meaning to the song Rocket Man by Elton John?  If so, what is it?  If you can explain it to me and I believe you I swear I'll come to your house and cook for you.

Don't forget the wine!  I sure didn't!

Cheers,
Megan J

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Potachos!


As a normal human being I have a soft spot for junk food.  I mean, seriously, who doesn't love french fries and onion rings and anything deep fried?  The only downer is that it's awful for you and makes you fat.  And I don't wanna get fat.  I already have to work out enough as is and that's kind of a bitch.  So, often I'll try to put a healthy spin on some of my junky favorites.  Like nachos.  If you look at most of the ingredients it's really not that bad for you.  It's mostly veggies and stuff.  I've found it tends to go down hill when you start to look at the chips and the things like sour cream and what not.  So, I came up with a toned down version that's still delicious!

You will need:

2 yukon gold potatoes
5 cherry tomatoes, halved
jalapenos, added to taste
1 can beans (your choice which kind)
1 small can sliced olives
1/2 an onion, chopped
1/2 a green pepper, chopped
1/2 a red pepper, chopped
1/4 cup mexican style cheese

Heat oven to 400.  Slice potatoes into uniform and bite size pieces.  Lay out on a cookie sheet and bake til crispy, stirring a few times.  This will take about 20 mins.  While those bake chop up your onion and both peppers.  Now you'll want a medium sized pan with high sides, whatever on earth that's actually called.  You'll want to use this to saute them over medium heat until onion becomes transparent.  Set aside.   While I wait for the potatoes to finish up I like to get all my other stuffs ready.  I like to drain and rinse my beans so I'll do that and get my tomatoes all sliced and open all my cans and that.  And drink wine :)  Duh.  When all of your ingredients are ready you'll want to throw them into that high sided pan I had you use.  Let everything cook around and heat up for about 5 mins.  Then add your cheese.  I find that the easiest way to get it melty and awesome is to put your cheese on, then add a little water and cover it.  This will create some pretty great steam and will get everything delicious.  Now you're ready to eat!

As I was writing this I was thinking of how rad it would be to throw in some corn.  I know most of the population would like ground beef with taco seasoning on there too and that would be mighty tasty.  Oh, and for most of the population who enjoy avocados, toss 'em on and enjoy!   Modify all you want.  I just ask that you drink wine while you do it.

Cheers!

Megan J


Thursday, May 3, 2012

Pork Roast

In many ways I am a traditional girl with traditional values and traditional tastes.  I like t-shirts and jeans, the man to make the first move and a tasty pork roast with potatoes.  Most of these traditional values come from being raised by traditional parents.  My mom was home everyday when I got home from school, I would like to say with fresh baked cookies waiting but lets get real, most moms don't have time for that.  My mom worked way beyond 40 hours a week to provide for his family.  We ate dinner as a family at the dinner table, not in front of TV, almost every night.  Each one of us kids had a night to do the dishes and if we didn't do it, honestly I don't know what would have happened, I don't remember being brave enough to risk it.  On occasion these nightly dinners consisted of pork roast and potatoes.  This recipe is not my mom's recipe, not all of her recipes are great, but it is a pretty tasty recipe all the same.

What you will need:

Pork roast (I used part of the one I bought for the pork verde, I had frozen it in several "single serve" baggies)
1 potato (peeled and chopped)
1/2 onion (peeled and sliced)
a handful of baby carrots
1/2 cup water
1/8 cup red wine (I used whatever bottle was lying around)
1-2 garlic cloves, minced
1 T. soy sauce
1/2 T. beef bouillon powder
approx. 1 tsp onion powder
approx. 1/2 tsp. celery seed
a few dashes of pepper

I know this looks like one hell of a list of ingredients but I promise, it's easy.  All you have to do is throw everything into your crock pot, turn it on high and wait for the pork to fall apart.  As I've said before I like my pork tender and falling apart.  When it starts to fall apart I know it's how I want it.  This took about four hours in my small crock pot and the pork started out frozen.  You can cook it on low if you plan on leaving it longer, say while you're spending 8 hours at work.

Enjoy!
Megan S.